The Day I Gave up my Dream

I will never forget the day at Wheaton College, Illinois, as a high school senior ,that I gave up my dream to be a professional dancer/actress.  I had been accepted into several colleges including Northwestern’s School of Performing Arts and was planning on a career on the stage.  I love acting, singing, and dancing and thought it would be incredible if that was what I actually got to do for a job.  I had been in several musicals in high school including an All Northern Nevada cast that had performed in several cities throughout the state and really enjoyed it.  

When I visited Wheaton College everything changed.  During chapel I remember looking across an auditorium filled with young adults singing praises to God.  I began crying (which is something I often do when I am touched at a deep level) and knew that this was where I belonged.  After coming from a public high school experience where I didn’t know any other whole hearted believers, I was longing for fellowship in Jesus.  I knew that His hand was upon my life, and that He had a plan for me that required me to consider everything else as loss as Paul did for the sake of fellowship in both His suffering and resurrection.  At that point there was no dance at Wheaton at all.  The choice before me was clear:  I could have Jesus or my dream.  By His grace I chose Him, and there is not a day that goes by that I do not thank Him for tenderizing my heart and enabling me to make that decision.  I wept for hours grieving what I thought was a loss of the expression of dance in my life but was resolute in my decision.  Little did I know……that the Lord would shortly resurrect that dream in a more glorious way than I could have ever asked or imagined!!!  I will tell my full testimony soon with all the wonderful details, but for now it will suffice to say that I have been able to use dance as an expression of my love for Jesus for His glory and for the salvation of many for the last 13 years of my life, and I continue to be blown away by the plans He’s had in His heart for me in this regard all along.  I can’t think of that day 14 years ago without a huge smile and tears in my eyes.  Truly there was no sacrifice.  I gave up nothing but gained everything!  I shudder to think of what my life would be like had I chosen my own way.  To those who are struggling to lay down their dream because of a desire to honor the Lord, be encouraged.  A resurrected dream is 10 million times better!

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3 thoughts on “The Day I Gave up my Dream

  1. I love worship dance and auditioned for a dance team in KC before you and Rose in 2003. Thank you for working to bring dance into the body of Christ. We need it. I’m a teaching artist/painter and working on a theology degree to further understand Christianity and the Arts.
    I’m currently reading Leland Ryken’s book The Liberated Imagination. He teaches at Wheaton. I wonder if you’ve met him. There is a treasure trove of info on Christianity and the Arts listed in the reading list on http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theological_aesthetics . And thanks again.

    • Hi there! I remember when you auditioned at IHOP-KC and really appreciate every one who was willing and excited to be on teams and pioneer dance becoming a part of the Harp and Bowl model! I’m encouraged to hear about all you are doing now regarding Christianity and the Arts. There is definitely a need for it. Thank you for passing along the link. I love researching this topic, and sometimes it can be hard to find good resources. I never had Dr. Ryken as a professor, but I do have The Liberated Imagination as well. It is currently at the top of my list to read through. Thank you very much for your encouragement.

  2. Pingback: Guest Post and a Few Favorites | Pencilled Daydream

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